Almost every night for the last two years I have sat down at the computer and looked at a few pictures of Johnny before going to bed. I'm not sure whether or not that's healthy, but until I get a call from Dr. Phil I'm probably going to keep doing it. A few days ago I was going through some pictures of Johnny skating. Pictures I have probably looked at at least a hundred times since he has passed, but this time I noticed something I had somehow been missing before. As I looked at one picture of Johnny doing an ollie it really struck me how happy he looked. I had always noticed his smile, but for some reason this time I was left with the impression that he was truly happy in that moment. When I went back through the other pictures I saw the same thing. He didn't just look like he was enjoying what he was doing, he looked like he was doing something he loved. It makes me smile knowing that Johnny had those moments.
What's changed in a year? This time last year going through those pictures would leave me with a tear in my eye (or maybe crying like a baby). Now I sometimes find myself smiling at those same memories.
Johnny,
You are the bravest person I have ever known. I love you, and I miss you very much.
Love,
Dad
6 comments:
Julie and Mike,
A couple weeks ago I picked up a copy of Texas Monthly while at the airport waiting to fly back to Houston from Dallas. Sitting on the plane, I read through the Texas Quarterback cover, and then turned to the story of your little boy. By the time I finished reading, I was heartbroken and wiping tears from my eyes.
I cannot begin to imagine what you have gone through, or how you have managed to stay so strong. I am the father of 3 (2 boys and 1 baby girl, ages 5/3/1), and from that perspective I'm unable to comprehend the loss you must feel.
Then I found your blog, looked at all the pictures of Johnny, and in particular read Mike's post titled "One Year Later", and now "Two Years Later". I found myself crying again, sitting at my office at work. I simply cannot imagine....
Although I have never met you, I know you must be very special people to have endured through all of this. Johnny's story has truly touched me, and made me reevaluate the priorities in my own life.
What a brave, amazing boy you shared with the world. I know that our Father in Heaven has him wrapped in His arms.
I wish all of God's grace and blessings on you and your family, and pray that you continue to find peace and happiness in your life.
Dear Johnny,
Two years ago today around this time you left this earth to live in heaven. You leave behind a wonderful legacy and you still find a way to touch so many lives even though you are no longer with us. I miss and love you very much.
Love,
Grandmommie
hey johnny we miss you little brother of sinsperation of skaters around the world. when i read this new blog. made me cry. just knowing how you were so young and the bravest kid. we always pray for you and your family.
Thank you so much for giving me the Spit Fire shirt and the race for a wish shirt. i will never forget that.
Ritchie Fernandez
I remember reading about Johnny right around the time I had my first son, and I remember thinking how painful it must have been to watch your son be so brave. Now here I am here three years later with a son who was also diagnosed with pre-b ALL. My son Oliver is the bravest and sweetest person I have ever met. Its so unfair to see such an innocent person endure so much pain.Were on our second battle striving for a cure. We think about Johnny often and will keep you all in our prayers.
God bless,
-Raphael
I went to school with Johnny in first grade and I think part of second and I thought he was the sweetest, cutesy little kid and Ill say, I had a crush on him:) so when he started missing school and I found out why I was devistated! I wanted to be able to help him, whether it was being a friend or donating money, however we moved, I missed him, but I still kept up with the news and stuff! Whenever I found out he had passed away I was crushed! I felt like I didn't do enough and I cried alot! I missed him and I beat myself up about it! Everynight he was in my prayers! It took a month or so but i realized he was skating on the ramps of heaven and now I don't cry, I smile that he's in a better place!:)
I love you, Johnny! We all do, and you are a spectacular skater!!<3
His story is inspirational and now that I'm able to, I try to do the most I can for children with diseases and cancers. (like the namesake for Layla Grace) like Raphael said, its so unfortunate that these young children and babies have to go through so much pain! Well, if we just keep researching. And coming up with cures we won't have such pain!
Love, Sammi<3
To Johnny's Parents:
Johnny touched a lot of people in a way that very few people can. He showed people how life should be lived, to enjoy the time we have and to hold those close to us even closer.
Everyone says that it will get easier as the years pass, but I think that you are getting to the point where seeing his happiness outweighs the sadness of losing him. Johnny had an amazing life and would want everyone to remember that.
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